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  Does Santa Claus exist? 
 
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Chris M Dec 24, 2003, 03:34am EST Reply - Quote - Report Abuse
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Does Santa Exist?
Is There a Santa Clause?

1. No known species of reindeer that can fly. BUT there are 300,000 species of living organisms yet to be classified, and while most of these are insects and germs, this does not completely rule out flying reindeer (which only Santa has ever seen.)

2. There are 2 billion children (persons under 18) in the world. BUT since Santa doesn't (appear) to handle the Muslim, Hindu, Jewish and Buddhist children, that reduces the workload to 15% of the total-378 million according to Population Reference Bureau. At an average (census) rate of 3.5 children per household, that's 91.8 million homes. One presumes there's at least one good child in each.

3. Santa has 31 hours of Christmas to work with, thanks to the different time zones and the rotation of the earth, assuming he travels east to west (which seems logical). This works out to 822.6 visits per second. This is to say that for each Christian household with good children, Santa has 1/1000th of a second to park, hop out of the sleigh, jump down the chimney, fill the stockings, distribute the remaining presents under the tree, eat whatever snacks have been left, get back up the chimney, get back into the sleigh and move on to the next house. Assuming that each of these 91.8 million stops are evenly distributed around the earth (which, of course, we know to be false but for the purposes of our calculations we will accept),we are now talking about .78 miles per household, a total trip of 75-1/2 million miles, not counting stops to do what most of us must do at least once every 31 hours, plus feeding and etc. This means that Santa's sleigh is moving at 650 miles per second, 3,000 times the speed of sound. For purposes of comparison, the fastest man-made vehicle on earth, the Ulysses space probe, moves at a poky 27.4 miles per second-a conventional reindeer can run, tops, 15 miles per hour.

4. The payload on the sleigh adds another interesting element. Assuming that each child gets nothing more than a medium-sized lego set (2 pounds), the sleigh is carrying 321,300 tons, not counting Santa, who is invariably described as overweight. On land, conventional reindeer can pull no more than 300 pounds. Even granting that "flying reindeer" (see point #1) could pull TEN TIMES the normal amount, we cannot do the job with eight, or even nine. We need 214,200 reindeer. This increases the payload-not even counting the weight of the sleigh-to 353,430 tons. Again, for comparison-this is four times the weight of the Queen Elizabeth.

5. 353,000 tons traveling at 650 miles per second creates enormous air resistance-this will heat the reindeer up in the same fashion as spacecrafts re-entering the earth's atmosphere. The lead pair of reindeer will absorb 14.3 QUINTILLION joules of energy. Per second. Each. In short, they will burst into flame almost instantaneously, exposing the reindeer behind them, and create deafening sonic booms in their wake. The entire reindeer team will be vaporized within 4.26 thousandths of a second. Santa, meanwhile, will be subjected to centrifugal forces 17,500.06 times greater than gravity. A 250-pound Santa (which seems ludicrously slim) would be pinned to the back of his sleigh by 4,315,015 pounds of force.

In conclusion: If Santa ever DID deliver presents on Christmas Eve, he's dead now.


--
It is said that when it comes to life, those who feel see it as a tragedy. Those who think see it as a comedy.
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Andy Parker Dec 24, 2003, 03:45am EST Reply - Quote - Report Abuse
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>> Re: Does Santa Claus exist?
Do I take it that's a "no" then????



Andy

"Nobody expects the Spanish Inquisition!!!!"
ray Stephens Dec 24, 2003, 03:55am EST Reply - Quote - Report Abuse
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Edited: Dec 24, 2003, 03:55am EST

 
>> Re: Does Santa Claus exist?
When Santa Claus was first "invented" the total population of Europe wasn't over 100,000,000 so I would assume that this would greatly reduce your numbers...

Shadow_Ops_Airman1 Dec 24, 2003, 03:56am EST Reply - Quote - Report Abuse
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>> Re: Does Santa Claus exist?
well it is stated that a Saint Nicolaus existed along time ago.

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Caveman017 Dec 24, 2003, 09:37am EST Reply - Quote - Report Abuse
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>> Re: Does Santa Claus exist?
santa's other name... NEO




i could believe it if "santa" were a vollunteer that game gifts to the children of a small town

Sincerely,
Brandon G.

~~I'd like to think about myself as a very advanced computer technician but it wont happen till i get a job:)
Jim B..... Dec 24, 2003, 01:40pm EST Reply - Quote - Report Abuse
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>> Re: Does Santa Claus exist?
No there’s not. My dad said to me when I was a young lad what id like for Christmas, and I said I hade my eye on this bike, dad said that’s it lad keep ye eye on it cause you will never get your a--- on it.

-----------------------------------------------------
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^1nsan1ty^ Dec 24, 2003, 02:07pm EST Reply - Quote - Report Abuse
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Edited: Dec 24, 2003, 02:07pm EST

 
>> Re: Does Santa Claus exist?
Maybe Santa will drop by with a Radeon 9800 XT for me:) I've been a *cough* good *cough* boy!

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Jim B..... Dec 24, 2003, 03:35pm EST Reply - Quote - Report Abuse
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>> Re: Does Santa Claus exist?
Im sure you will not be left out '^1nsan1ty^' you have been good this year yes?

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Outlaw 77 Dec 25, 2003, 12:59am EST Reply - Quote - Report Abuse
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>> Re: Does Santa Claus exist?
Santa does exist, his aliases are Visa and Mastercard whom I am
forced to interact with on a monthly basis.

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Shadow_Ops_Airman1 Dec 25, 2003, 01:44am EST Reply - Quote - Report Abuse
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>> Re: Does Santa Claus exist?
yup

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master of muppets Jan 08, 2004, 02:35pm EST Reply - Quote - Report Abuse
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>> Re: Does Santa Claus exist?
ok i know i'm kinda answering this a bit late but he exists if you want more presents when your younger :D but what if he and the reindeer had heatproof foam coverign them? they WOULDN'T gte vaporised so assuming he can p**s really fast as well there should be no problem

If life was fair Bill Gates would be dead by now
Chris M Dec 15, 2004, 01:09am EST Reply - Quote - Report Abuse
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>> Re: Does Santa Claus exist?
Found this from last year and thought I would give it a bump. Happy Reading. :)

--
It is said that when it comes to life, those who feel see it as a tragedy. Those who think see it as a comedy.
Michael A. Dec 15, 2004, 02:17am EST Reply - Quote - Report Abuse
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>> Re: Does Santa Claus exist?
Interesting stuff.

Michael A.
Website: http://itnode.net
Wipis Dec 16, 2004, 10:14am EST Reply - Quote - Report Abuse
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Edited: Dec 16, 2004, 10:18am EST

 
>> Re: Does Santa Claus exist?
I think you forgot the landing. Assuming somehow the sleigh survived the flight the several hundred thousand tons moving at that such a speed would have to decelerate at an unbelievable rate such that Santa would be turned to mush. Not to mention the transfer of force from all that weight (at a speed) onto a roof would probably destroy your house and send out a shockwave to kill an entire city.

In reply to master of puppets if you put "heat proof" foam on the reindeer they would not be able to move or breath. Not to mention I dont think there is a single substance (real or magical) that could withstand the punishment of what was it 4.1 quintrillion joules..

I hate people who have signatures on their posts.
Wizard Prang Dec 16, 2004, 10:48am EST Reply - Quote - Report Abuse
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>> Re: Does Santa Claus exist?
I'll live.

Prang

Who is... oh, never mind :)
Mr. Aveng Dec 16, 2004, 01:49pm EST Reply - Quote - Report Abuse
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>> Re: Does Santa Claus exist?
"353,430 tons. Again, for comparison-this is four times the weight of the Queen Elizabeth"

The queen of england weighs 88357,5 tons?
LOL

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Will Olson II Dec 16, 2004, 02:00pm EST Reply - Quote - Report Abuse
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Edited: Dec 16, 2004, 02:02pm EST

 
>> Re: Does Santa Claus exist?
haha thats pretty funny stuff Chris atleast I got a laught out of it picturing santa moving faster than the speed of sound.... and the "re-entry" reindeer.... exploding into bits.... HAHAHAHA I about p**sed my pants.

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bonfire-db Dec 16, 2004, 03:24pm EST Reply - Quote - Report Abuse
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>> Re: Does Santa Claus exist?
Of course we haven't ruled out supernatural forces...

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pete mielke Dec 18, 2004, 04:43pm EST Reply - Quote - Report Abuse
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>> Re: Does Santa Claus exist?
the mathematical proof that santa does not exist is all very good and true. i couldnt agree more. i have some proof that does not rely on mathematics, however. that's right: proof, but not from mind-boggling numbers. to read more about it, go to

http://www.randomness.us/

~pete

Kevin M. Dec 18, 2004, 10:23pm EST Reply - Quote - Report Abuse
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>> Re: Does Santa Claus exist?
thanks. now i know the truth, i h8 u guys. :)

Tommy Riscuit Dec 18, 2004, 10:40pm EST Reply - Quote - Report Abuse
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>> Re: Does Santa Claus exist?
Of course Santa Claus exists...

Santa uses quantum teleportation which allows him to exist at every point in the universe simultaneously.
Delivering all the presents takes only a fraction of a second. The rest of the year is spent storing energy to power the universal teleporter for that fraction of a second.

Newton and Einstein had no imagination....



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